on saying g'bye

by Amy

it always sucks when someone you love has to leave.  be it a night or a year…it just isn’t awesome.  it is the opposite of awesome.

he will only be gone for three months and we will still be able to talk to him lots, but it still hurt to say g’bye.

i begged to park and come in with him.  no.  he kept telling me no.  i tried to convince him that we wouldn’t be a hassle.  no.  he kept telling me no.

i felt like he was being unreasonable and rude.  like he was in too much of a rush to make a minute of love in there for us.

but then i saw the tears.

he put them to bed last night while i was downstairs.  he was up there for a long time.  story time?  brushing teeth?  yeah…it takes about that long.

instead, he was hugging them.  telling them he loved them.  reminding them of how they could be helpful to their mama.

he was saying his g’bye then.  and here i am, asking him to do it all over again.  to have his heart wrenched for another thirty minutes.

i got it.

the loudspeaker kept telling us “the yellow curb is for loading and unloading only.  parked cars will be ticketed…” but we didn’t care.

we all piled out.  the rolling wheels of his super cool suitcase sidetracked the kids for a minute but then, we were all hugs.

we were all tears.

we were all i love you’s.

we said g’bye.  but just for a bit.  just for three months.  it could be way worse.  but it still hurts.

so now, we will play and go about life.  he will be in school.  we will post pictures and face time and stay on the phone way longer than normal.  we will find fun ways to count down the time and we will miss him something fierce but it will all be ok.  it always is.